Poop Buddies

For the life of me I cannot understand my kids need, to offer each other support and companionship when one or the other decides to use the bathroom. Seriously, what is up with THAT? They are just constantly following each others' butts into the bathroom during poop time. She will drop anything she's doing and follow him when he has to go. He will wake her from a nap and ask her to join him. It's insanity, I tell you!

I walked into their room today to find B sitting on the bathroom floor jabbering away, while H was on the toilet. And of course since things like this don't just stop there when wanting to gross a mother out, they soon started arguing about her poop. He kept insisting he had heard three plops, she said it was just two. "I KNOW how many came out of my bummy" she yelled at him. "Yeah and there were THREE" he yelled back. "Were not" "Were too" "Were not" "Were too" "Were not" "Were too" "Were not" "Were too THREE." I could have gagged them with toilet paper, but I decided to bang my head against a wall instead. It drowns out the sounds of their screechy angry voices better.

So, they've been forbidden to acompany each other to the bathroom for poops. I put my foot down and that's that. "No more going to the bathroom with each other for poops" I said in my most controlled and firm tone. They both sulked for a few minutes and H informed me that I'm a mean mommy who's no fun. "Find something else to do together which is fun" said the mean mommy. And so I got to watch them accompany each other to the bathroom when each one wanted to pee. "Not pee either" I said more firmly. "You said POOP... you didn't say PEE." "Well, I'm saying it now"

B: Oohhh that's a foul and you KNOW it Mommy!!!!

I'm convinced there is a handbook for this, but our parents have hidden it from us and are secretly laughing their heads off while we struggle through these episodes. I just know this is their revenge for all those times we rebelled. So that's it! No more ugly handmade craft gifts they get to proudly display on their shelves for Grandparents Day. Not till I see the handbook.


CenzLuccsMom said...

LOL!! I love your post. I have twin boys and I find it so funny that the potty trained one insists his brother accompany him to "listen" when he poops! The listening brother is always so proud and claps for his trained sibling, its nutty!!!