I'll apologize in advance for any typos in this post, since I just saw a bright, shocking pink van pass by below my balcony. On a cold, dreary winter evening like this, it nearly blinded me much like Mariah Carey's bling must have blinded all those who caught a glimpse of her, at the Golden Globes this year. What is up with that woman and her horrendous dress sense? And, who was that little boy with her? Is that the male mid-life crises, sports car equivalent for women now?
So, this week has been busy with the usual this, that, kids and the other. Being online has been nothing but a headache, and I was about ready to burn switch off my computer for a while, and take a break from way too much drama, when I noticed I'd been defriended by someone on Facebook. Now, this is only the second (or third) time this has happened to me in the last three years that I know of, because really, I don't login everyday and count how many friends I have online. Who cares right?
Anyway, it got me thinking about the craziness surrounding online interaction, and how social networks, message boards, chat services etc. all enable passive aggressive behavior. Stop and think for a moment... How many "Fuck you" buttons are there available online which don't really let you say what you want to say, but allow you to be passive aggressive?
The Ignore Button
It's available on message boards, on chat. Facebook calls their one the "Hide" button... And, even your cell phone probably has one for calls you want to avoid right? So, now you have the option of not reading stuff you don't want to read, from people who are on your "friends" list. It's so easy to click that little button, and if you do it a lot, then I'm betting you don't have the balls to tell your friends to just shut the fuck up when they spew out crap. Oh, and hiding Farmville and CafeWorld updates on Facebook does not count. I do it all the time, because I'm not interested in how many imaginary beef stews someone has on their online stove, that they made too much of, and absolutely must share with all their six hundred friends, eight times a day.
The Report Button
Really! Is this Kindergarten? Do these sites not realize how much they're enabling the uptight people who lack spine? Some people like to report everything! They're like dude, she posted the word "sex" in her response to me, that's totally unacceptable, I think she's a closet lesbian, and that goes against my religious beliefs which require me to wear magical underpants (even though I do think she's hot), so I'm going to report her post! And, before you know it, some pompous moderator sends you an email asking you to refrain from intimidating other posters with your trash talk. Because, apparently the word 'sex' reminds some people how little of it they get, and that's not right.
The Remove from Friends Button
Aka the de-friend button in Facebook jargon. And, this has undoubtedly got to be the most childish, idiotic and cowardly button of all. I understand many friendships end, but come on people... No need to abuse the button. Again, for those who lack the balls to actually send someone a note saying Hey, this friendship is over, it's perfect! Whatever happened to good old fashioned "Getting it off your chest" "Talking it out" "Addressing the issue" with a friend? Not that it's not healthy to cut the toxic ones out of your life sometimes, but having the option to just remove someone from your online social circle with one click, is driving people to some pretty pathetic behavior. We're all like OMG she posted six comments to her other friend's status update, and didn't even "Like" mine... Defriend, defriend, defriend! I'm all powerful, you don't deserve to socialize with me on Facebook anymore. So there!
WTF?
The Like Button (OK, not officially a passive aggressive one, but...)
... Why no 'Dislike' button? And, if someone doesn't click the 'Like' button on my update, should I assume they don't like it? If I were insecure, I'd stay up nights wondering why no one likes the song lyric I posted recently because I was bored. They didn't click the button, they must hate me, so I'll defriend them now, the traitorous gits!
The Ban Button
A power hungry, message board administrator's dream. Enough said!
The Block Button
Seriously? If it's not a stalker who wants your body, what is the need may I ask? Is defriending someone not enough? No, let's block them and really show our loathing.... From behind the screen, where we're safe, and they can't find us... Ever! After we change our phone number, or move to Tibet.
Why do so many social networks enable this piss poor behavior? I thought the internet was all about bringing people together, opening up lines of communication never known before, giving people a platform to express themselves, share thoughts, ideas, likes, dislikes. A place where adults can interact without imagining they're in grade school.
Why are we screwing it up for ourselves?
5 comments:
Facebook totally needs a Fuck You button!
Too funny Anne. The Block one is my favorite ... it's not enough to defriend you ... I have to make it so that you can't see what I post on other people's pages, you can see my name is anyone's friends list. Wow. It's slightly crazy.
I think maybe the people that go power hungry on the internet have zero power or control in their real lives. And let's be honest. Most people just aren't willing to be as honest and upfront as we are.
I'm still looking for the "Stick your fingers in your ears and say 'La-La-Lahhh-I can't hear you'" button to pop up somewhere. I could use that one today...
Great! I admit to being immature and enjoying defriending people at times.
OH how true! Never thought of it that way before, but goodness we do have a lot of FU buttons in this world dont we?
I think its because so many people have such little control over their own lives, that really the little FU buttons are the only 'real' control they have.... who knows
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