Informal Debate Rules - Thou Shalt and Thou Shalt Not

Most of my family or friends will tell you that I love to debate. They'll also tell you it's just another word for 'argue' and they're right. I can argue about anything, with anyone, at anytime, any day. My husband knowing this, married me anyway, and now probably lives to regret it. My four year old children, or at least my daughter is definitely biding her time watching, learning and preparing to kick my ass when I least expect it. I expect it every second of every day... I'm way ahead of her, and much taller.

What most people fail to understand, is that it's not a love for the actual argument, or beating someone when they're trying to make a point or **gasp** winning. It's just something people like me, do. And, we're not bad people, or bullies or whatever the hell you want to call us. We just like to make our point too, and most times we're so hell bent on making that point, we really do come across as bitches or bastards. Which is a load of crap. We love people, for the most part. I know I do, and I love to learn from them too.. Just because I'm talking hard and fast, does not mean I'm not listening. People tend to forget that when debating with the 'love to argue' types.

But, there are rules! Our rules, and we follow them, and just wish others would too. Granted they may not be formal rules listed on some international debate website, but they exist (or should) in any informal debate setting. So I'm going to type them out now, and probably piss off a lot of people in my life.

The Rules

1. Know What You're Debating
For there is nothing more annoying, than a person who likes to argue about something, he has little or no clue about. These are not the 'argue about everything' types... these ones usually have one pet subject they are ignorant about, and they love to show the world just how frickin ignorant they are about it... every chance they get.

2. Try to Understand
Make the attempt, really, it won't kill you. Time and again I see people not bothering to even attempt understanding what the other person is saying. Maybe they're just busy listening and agreeing with the voice (voices?) in their own head, so they can't hear, leave alone listen to anything else.

3. Be Yourself
If you do not have a personality, find one online or something, then adopt it.. and STICK with it. But to do not pull the whole I-have-a-multiple-personality-disorderish-type-of-personality. Which means you're nice one minute, and go completely off the deep end the next. It's confusing, and I for one never know if I should keep talking, or offer to run to the nearest pharmacy and buy you your meds.

4. Don't Be a Whiny Ass Baby
I'm going to play the whiny ass baby here for a second to really get the point across. I bring up a topic, and people get talking. Someone makes a point, and I begin an argument. They make another valid point, and all I can say in return is 'You're bullying me, wah wah wah, you're being so mean wah wah wah, and rude wah wah wah, and a bitch wah wah, wah, and I wish you wouldn't. You're so angry wah wah wah and I don't like anger because I've had a really hard day wah wah wah, I'm just trying to be nice and understanding of you and your point, but you won't let it go wah wah wah.

If I downed a drink for everytime I've encountered one of these piss poor excuses of "debators", I would be an alcoholic.

5. Keep it Simple.
Be short and to the point please and save the lengthy stuff for your blogs or journals like so many of us do. I like to debate, not lose my hearing to monotone crap, or make my retinas bleed a slow death. I just came across a couple of such "debate" posts on Facebook, and I swear to all that is holy, my eyes screamed in terror and I felt like they were gasping for air. It was terrible... sentence after sentence of type which would cure me of my insomnia if my eyes did not protest.

Thanks for stopping by... Have a great weekend!!



Caba said...

Ok, like you didn't already know this, but I love everything about this post. But then again, I'm a bitch.

Jenny Georgio-who said...

I think we have a lot in common. My poor husband married me knowing how outspoken and arguementive I am.

I won't debate anything and everything but when I do debate something I will be knowledgable about the subject at hand. It's my pet peeve when people get all defensive about something and they are actually completely clueless.

Debi said...

I'd loooove to see you debate Caba on something... anything... Now THAT would be a good show. :popcorn

Caffeinated Bliss said...

Deb... It would go something like this...
Caba: "It's all a bunch of BS"
Me: I really don't give a rat's ass
Caba: Works for me
Me: Me too
Caba: Let's go get a drink
Me: Yeah baby!!

Unknown said...

Did you call someone a BABY?? I'm telling!