1, 2, 3... Judge!

During the last month I've been thinking over a ton of topics to write about. Briefly considered the biggies like gay marriage (acceptance), abortion, religious tolerance, and the war in Pakistan. But, I'm prone to violence when talking about these issues, so I've put them on the back burner for now. Not saying this post won't be verbally violent.. Must not disappoint those who claim to love me for speaking my mind, and also those who hate me for it, yet keep coming back for more.

So anyway... Pakistan. Our sovereign state, a misunderstood country, a hated nation, or whatever you may want to call it is fine with me. But, this is for the people who once lived here, and no longer do. The ones who look back fondly at their time spent here, their carefree childhood days, their wonderful school years, their Desi weddings, and the birth of their firstborns. They're also the ones who look at us with some sadness, and pity. And, judgment!

But, when you abandoned the ship...

Can you really afford to judge us?

Or tell us what to do?

I'm not talking about the massive political situation, or the law and order situation we have here. It happens everywhere, and someone has to win at who is best at it. Right now, we win. Tomorrow? Who knows?

No, I'm talking about our day to day living, how we socialize, what we do, how we raise our kids, the kind of education we give them. I'm talking middle class and above, and I don't appreciate former Pakistanis sitting in their "free" countries as minorities, turning up their noses at how we conduct ourselves, or how they think we should be conducting ourselves. We do what we do, and we don't need your advice, or your criticism. We don't care how you "do it" in Australia or New York. We don't need to always adopt bits of the same culture you adopt everyday, just because you say so. We have McDonald's, and we have Facebook... And, our teens are just as out of control as yours are, our kids are just as addicted to junk food and video games as yours are (although maybe not as obese just yet), and our fundementalist religious right is more vocal and annoying than yours could ever be. So, we're just fine, thank you very much.

I'm so tired of constantly being told by former Pakistanis, of how they think people in Pakistan should live. Do this, do that, try this, try that. WTF? Most of them come across as sheltered children, who are seeing things for the first time. You've lived in the west for more than 15 years... And, the novelty still hasn't worn off? How limited an upbringing did you have? How badly did your parents screw you up? FFS... Stop! Live your life, and let us live ours. We're not backward asses who need to change our ways, or be introduced to brilliant concepts which existed decaded before your sorry asses went west.

I could list how full our lives are, and how we manage to rise above the crap which terrifies and disgusts us every.single.day. How we struggle to maintain a sense of normality in our day to day living. I could tell you all about the incredible strength, and courage of the people in this broken nation, or our children who face dangers most of you cannot even begin to imagine. But, my fingers would start to hurt, and I also don't want to sound too much like a Christian apologist.

I love that you love us, love the country of your birth, and wish that things were different. But, haggling people is not the way to go. So back off a little... No need to be pompous asses. It's not becoming.



Urooj said...

I know what you mean =| I'm 20 years old now, and while I was born in Pakistan I have never actually lived there (my parents moved when I was a couple of months old). I can't decide what's worse - blaming Pakistani's "back home" for living a liberal, secular "Westernized" lifestyle, or maintaining absurd moral standards for children who ARE growing up in a typical Western environment (i.e. don't show your elbows, do not hang out with boys in university even if they are your class fellows, etc.). The older generation that looks fondly upon 'old' Pakistan scoffs at how consumerist and materialistic it has become, while forgetting that this is a universal problem. I find that we are far too obsessed (as a nation) with being self-righteous. A good example of such mentality is the comments that the yet-to-be-released "Slackistan" received - with many people (often West-residing Pakistani's who scoff at Western lifestyles) in shock that a Pakistani director would portray Pakistani youth as freely dating or drinking, while completely pushing aside the message it was trying to send (i.e. that the elite live in their own bubble, separate from rest of society). It bugs be beyond measure and wish the future generation will be wiser, and realize that not every single person from your country can OR ought to be just like you.

Urooj said...

I realize that your post deals with the 'superiority complex' some Pakistani's have while living in the West and makes me a little embarrassed that I derailed the discussion there =P but still felt good to let it out.

Caffeinated Bliss said...

Thank you for stopping by Urooj.. Good thoughts. :)

Hope to "see" you again.