An interesting post on a message board caught my eye today. It was a question about when everyone knew they were in love, and when they told their significant other that they loved them.
I don't remember the first time I told my husband I loved him. ***Ignores the gasps of shock and snorts of disgust***
I don't remember the moment, how I felt, whether he said it to me first, what he wore, how surprised I was or was not, if it was raining outside, nothing. He probably remembers it all, the ass. And, he'll lord it over me someday when I'm lording something over him. Again, ass!
I do however, remember all the times I fell in love with him. How many times can you fall in love with the same person? Apparently, many in my case. But, that's probably because I kept falling, and kept ignoring how much I was falling. It was not supposed to end in LOVE for heaven's sake! No, no, couldn't have any of that stuff ruining a fabulous friendship. So, I busied myself ignoring the numerous times I fell for him. Did I have issues or what?
Like the time he outrageously flirted with me at a party, and my then boyfriend was in the next room, strutting around in tailored pants he was afraid would wrinkle if he sat down. Or the time he convinced his girlfriend to chop off her locks, because I didn't like her hairstyle and mentioned it to him. Also, the time my friends asked me to cook for them, and then wouldn't eat because the food was way too spicy. Wusses! But HE ate it... And, asked for seconds. I was so happy, I pretended I couldn't hear his stomach cursing me to oblivion.
Over endless cups of coffee, in cozy cafes, late night chats on the internet, immediately after we had spent several hours together. Ridiculous email exchanges, unexpected roses for no reason at all, friendship cards, Oreo cookies, the ever available shoulder to cry on, massive arguments, our preference to talk to each other instead of the whole group which surrounded us a lot. We were falling alright, and hard. No way was I going to acknowledge it.
So, that first kiss threw me. And I panicked, for the first time in my life. Then, something, something and something more... Before I knew it, LOVE! It bitch slapped me in the face so hard, I couldn't get over it. I suppose it had, had enough of lurking in the far recesses of my mind. I'm not going to say 'heart' because that's just stupid talk... Don't you just hate it when someone says they know something in their heart? Just say 'brain', or 'mind' ffs. I suppose it sounds all mushy and sweet. I'd rather have an Oreo instead.
From there it was smooth sailing. Fast courtship (do people still say courtship?), surprise engagement (MIL, the old bag, is still reeling with the rest of her clan), small wedding (I wanted a big wedding, because I was greedy and wasteful then), twins ten months later and ,no sleep ever since. Fun!
And that's the story of how I fell in love with my husband. And, that lurrrve has kept us married for five years. Well, that and, the ability to tune out on occasion... OK, OK, more than the odd occasion. But, he tunes out more than I do... Not that I blame him, I'm a huge, incessant nag.
We didn't have the whole two strangers eyes meet across a crowded room and they know it in their hearts, that it is love stuff. Although, for those who it has happened to, great! Send me your story, I'll publish it here on my blog.
I don't remember the first time I told my husband I loved him. ***Ignores the gasps of shock and snorts of disgust***
I don't remember the moment, how I felt, whether he said it to me first, what he wore, how surprised I was or was not, if it was raining outside, nothing. He probably remembers it all, the ass. And, he'll lord it over me someday when I'm lording something over him. Again, ass!
I do however, remember all the times I fell in love with him. How many times can you fall in love with the same person? Apparently, many in my case. But, that's probably because I kept falling, and kept ignoring how much I was falling. It was not supposed to end in LOVE for heaven's sake! No, no, couldn't have any of that stuff ruining a fabulous friendship. So, I busied myself ignoring the numerous times I fell for him. Did I have issues or what?
Like the time he outrageously flirted with me at a party, and my then boyfriend was in the next room, strutting around in tailored pants he was afraid would wrinkle if he sat down. Or the time he convinced his girlfriend to chop off her locks, because I didn't like her hairstyle and mentioned it to him. Also, the time my friends asked me to cook for them, and then wouldn't eat because the food was way too spicy. Wusses! But HE ate it... And, asked for seconds. I was so happy, I pretended I couldn't hear his stomach cursing me to oblivion.
Over endless cups of coffee, in cozy cafes, late night chats on the internet, immediately after we had spent several hours together. Ridiculous email exchanges, unexpected roses for no reason at all, friendship cards, Oreo cookies, the ever available shoulder to cry on, massive arguments, our preference to talk to each other instead of the whole group which surrounded us a lot. We were falling alright, and hard. No way was I going to acknowledge it.
So, that first kiss threw me. And I panicked, for the first time in my life. Then, something, something and something more... Before I knew it, LOVE! It bitch slapped me in the face so hard, I couldn't get over it. I suppose it had, had enough of lurking in the far recesses of my mind. I'm not going to say 'heart' because that's just stupid talk... Don't you just hate it when someone says they know something in their heart? Just say 'brain', or 'mind' ffs. I suppose it sounds all mushy and sweet. I'd rather have an Oreo instead.
From there it was smooth sailing. Fast courtship (do people still say courtship?), surprise engagement (MIL, the old bag, is still reeling with the rest of her clan), small wedding (I wanted a big wedding, because I was greedy and wasteful then), twins ten months later and ,no sleep ever since. Fun!
And that's the story of how I fell in love with my husband. And, that lurrrve has kept us married for five years. Well, that and, the ability to tune out on occasion... OK, OK, more than the odd occasion. But, he tunes out more than I do... Not that I blame him, I'm a huge, incessant nag.
We didn't have the whole two strangers eyes meet across a crowded room and they know it in their hearts, that it is love stuff. Although, for those who it has happened to, great! Send me your story, I'll publish it here on my blog.
6 comments:
I was 16 when I met my hubs, we dated for 2 weeks, then I moved to another country. Came back for a vacay when I was 18 (in June) I never went home, we got married in August, that was 19 years ago.
My story is more like yours I think. We were friends for so long that I was falling in love with him for a very long time, I just didn't want to admit it, for fear it would fuck up the best friendship of my life. I'm glad I finally admitted it though!
Awwww.... Sweet!!..
ADL, i love the bitch in you! lol
Mine started off as a lurid little secret affair... but don't get the wrong idea. It was not an affair because anyone was already spoken for. No, we were hiding our feelings from the friend who made the mistake of introducing us. How she failed to realize that two people she liked for the same reasons might get along pretty well is beyond me but we knew she would not approve and so we kept it quiet. That is, at least until the electroshock therapy sessions ended.
When the thrill of being secretive was gone, we looked at each other and decided perhaps there was a little bit more to it and went from there.
I don't recall when we first said it or who was wearing what either because it wasn't a moment in time to me. It was slow and brewing just under the surface like a riptide. And yeah, when I finally acknowledged that I was no longer playing for the sake of playing, it sucked me right under.
I was dragged to a party 20 years ago, and that was the first time I saw my husband. I knew the minute I saw him, he was it - he felt familiar. Unfortunately someone forgot to tell him and it took me a couple of weeks to get him to be as equally in love. Now we ride the roller coaster of marriage and I wouldn't trade him for anything. God made him just for me.
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